Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Weird.


It is weird.
I thought I’d be super excited when I get a job.
But somehow I am not.
I am numb.
Even after one week into ‘work’.
The feeling has not sunken in yet.
And this feeling of not feeling anything is not great.
My enthusiasm has faded.
Perhaps I need an ignition.
Is this what I was waiting for? All this while?
I don’t like to talk. I don’t like to write.
It is weird.

P.S: This post comes as an obligation to all the kind readers who have been after me to write something. I owe this post to them.
Obligation? It is weird.

P.P.S: Sometimes I feel I have split personalities. I have two faces- one that jumps around, smiles always, loves being the center of attention, talks non-stop, laughs whole heartedly, battles eyelids, makes faces, scribbles, gets decked up, colour codes things, talks in emoticons, wishes on stars, slurps on ice-creams…
Other one is quiet, keeps to herself, smiles but never laughs, reads, doesn’t talk, listens, observes, thinks, judges, gets organized, stays at peace with things, and is asked hundred and thirty times, “S, why don’t you talk?” and she smiles and says. “Nothing like that.”, while deep inside she wonders- really what’s the matter!

The problem is- the two faces are not in my control. It is involuntary. And that is what makes life so weird.